Dear Friend,

You know what they say, right? “Money can’t buy happiness.” But let’s be honest—it sure does keep the lights on, pays for overpriced smoothies, and funds that occasional impulse splurge on a scented candle you definitely didn’t need. Hi, I’m Butter, your friendly existential financial thinker. And today, I had a revelation so mind-boggling, it nearly made me cancel my Netflix subscription: my FIRE number is so high, it could hire an assistant just to hold the elevator for it in the Burj Khalifa.

In case you’re wondering, what’s a FIRE number and why does it sound so intimidating?—let me enlighten you. FIRE stands for Financial Independence, Retire Early. It’s the dream of saving and investing enough money to quit your job and live off your investments while the rest of the world is still hitting snooze at 7 a.m. Sounds dreamy, doesn’t it?

Well, here’s the tea: after calculating my annual expenses (a modest ₹30,00,000—because sushi isn’t free), factoring in sectoral inflation at a spicy 11% (because the cost of living loves drama), and planning for a lifespan of 100 years (because I fully intend to outlive my enemies), my FIRE number looked less like a goal and more like Elon Musk’s Mars budget.

I stared at it. It stared back. I felt a bit faint, but also defiant. Because if there’s one thing Butter doesn’t do, it’s crumble under pressure. Instead, I whipped out a journal (unused, naturally—because apparently, I collect those now) and started sketching out a plan.

Step 1: The Meltdown (Totally Normal)
For a hot minute, I thought, Forget FIRE, I’ll just work forever like a corporate vampire. But then I remembered: FIRE isn’t about being filthy rich. It’s about freedom—the freedom to paint on Tuesdays, nap guilt-free on Sundays, and never again sit through a meeting that could’ve been an email. That’s when I decided: Butter isn’t giving up. Butter’s going to sizzle her way to financial independence.

Step 2: The Plan to Not Die Broke
If you’re staring at your own daunting FIRE number right now, here’s what I’ve decided to do. Feel free to steal these ideas (and maybe credit me when you write your memoir):

1. Multiple Income Streams (aka, Make That Dough)

Relying on a single job for income is like eating toast without butter—uninspired and kind of sad. So I’m exploring passive income streams: freelance gigs, selling handmade candles, and maybe even starting a blog (spoiler: you’re reading it). If money doesn’t grow on trees, I’m planting seeds everywhere.

2. SIPs: The Slow Cooker of Wealth

Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs) are like financial crockpots. You add a little every month, let compound interest do its magic, and boom—a few years later, you’ve got a piping hot pile of money. It’s boring, but hey, boring builds empires.

Step 3: Butter’s Fancy Investment Buffet
For those of us who dream big but have realistic wallets, it’s all about diversification. Here’s what’s on my financial plate:

ISO: Stock Options from Work

If your company offers incentive stock options (ISO), take them. They’re like getting shares on a discount, and when the company grows, so does your portfolio. Think of it as a mini lottery ticket for future-you.

Unlisted Shares: Pre-IPO Excitement

Unlisted shares are like VIP tickets to a concert before the masses even know the artist. It’s risky, but if the company goes public, you could be riding the profit wave like a financial surfer.

Global Investments: Butter Goes International

Why limit yourself to one country? Investing in global index funds like the S&P 500 is like ordering an international buffet—you get a little bit of everything, and it’s deliciously diversified. Plus, if one market stumbles, another might be thriving.

REITs: Real Estate Without Leaky Faucets

Real Estate Investment Trusts (REITs) let you invest in property without becoming an impromptu plumber. You just collect dividends and let someone else deal with the messy stuff. It’s real estate, minus the drama.

Crypto: Butter Dabbles in the Future

Cryptocurrency is the wild child of finance—exciting, unpredictable, and potentially lucrative. I’m dabbling, but only with money I can afford to lose (aka my “Friday pizza” budget).

Step 4: The Golden Rules for FIRE
Here are my commandments for this journey:

Automate Everything: SIPs, savings, and even my coffee subscription—it’s all on autopilot because future Butter doesn’t need extra stress.

Learn Before You Burn (Money): I’m diving into financial books like The Intelligent Investor by Benjamin Graham and Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki. Knowledge is wealth, my friend.

Diversify Smartly: From stocks to bonds to global funds, I’m not putting all my eggs in one basket. Even if that basket is lined with gold.

Step 5: Butter’s Bigger Picture
FIRE isn’t just about money—it’s about buying back time. It’s about having the freedom to say no to things that drain you and yes to the things that light you up. It’s about sipping chai on a Tuesday morning, starting a passion project, or simply enjoying the quiet peace of not being in a rush.

Sure, my FIRE number still looks like it belongs in the sci-fi section, but every small step—every SIP, every new income stream, every expense I cut—brings me closer. And if I can do it with my scented-candle addiction and sushi cravings, so can you.

So here’s to us, my fellow dreamers. Let’s save, invest, and laugh our way to a life rich in every sense of the word.

Yours in snacks, spreadsheets, and stubborn optimism,
Butter 🧈