Ah, Valentine’s Day. The one day a year when flower shops commit daylight robbery, restaurants suddenly forget what “reservations” mean, and people everywhere are either smothering their significant others in love or aggressively pretending they’re above it all. And to all of you—whether you’re madly in love, semi-in love, “love is a scam” in love, or just in love with snacks—I say:

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY, MY PRECIOUS BUTTERY SOULS!

Now, before you roll your eyes, let’s get one thing straight: Valentine’s Day isn’t just for couples. It’s for love in all its forms—romantic love, friend love, pet love, and most importantly, self-love (which, let’s be honest, is the longest relationship you’ll ever be in).

So, in the spirit of the day, let’s celebrate YOU. Because whether or not someone is bringing you overpriced chocolates today, you are worthy of all the love, laughter, and joy in the world.

For My Lovebirds Out There:

Ah, yes. You adorable, heart-eyed creatures. I see you with your couple’s brunch plans, your handwritten love notes, and your mysteriously urgent Amazon Prime deliveries from last night. I love that for you! Truly. Go forth and be disgustingly cute. Just don’t post TOO many kissing selfies, okay? Some of us are just here for the memes.

For My Singles:

First of all, congratulations on not having to share your fries. You’re thriving. Take yourself out on a date, buy yourself something nice, and remember: being single on Valentine’s Day doesn’t mean you’re alone—it means you get to skip the relationship drama and go straight to dessert. And honestly? That’s a power move.

For My Situationship Warriors:

If your Valentine’s Day plans involve texting, “Sooo what are we?” and waiting three to five business days for a response… bestie, it’s time to love yourself first. Today is about clarity and setting standards, not decoding emojis. You deserve certainty, not “u up?” at 11:57 PM.

For My Pet Parents:

Let’s be real: your pet is your real Valentine. And you know what? They deserve it. They’ve never ghosted you, forgotten your birthday, or judged you for eating peanut butter straight from the jar. Give them an extra treat today and tell them I said, “You are the only love that truly matters.”

For My Self-Love Enthusiasts:

If your Valentine’s Day plans involve a face mask, a comfort movie, and aggressively romanticizing your own life… congratulations, you are doing it RIGHT. Go buy yourself that ridiculous bouquet. Write yourself a love letter. You are the main character.

At the end of the day, Valentine’s Day is just an excuse to eat good food, tell people you love them, and wear obnoxiously red clothing. So whether you’re madly in love, bitterly single, or just here for the heart-shaped Reese’s—I love you. You’re incredible. You deserve love today and every single day.

Now go forth and be cheesy, dramatic, and as extra as a 2000s rom-com soundtrack.

XOXO,

Butter