Category: life

I accidentally stumbled across my teenage journal last weekend. Accidentally, because I was in the middle of a Marie Kondo-inspired decluttering session that somehow spiraled into me sitting on the floor, surrounded by dusty notebooks and forgotten treasures, like some sentimental raccoon. I opened the journal just to peek, and two hours later, I was still there, cringing at every “dear diary” entry.

Friends, if you ever want to experience true horror, read your teenage dreams. Mine included becoming a world-famous fashion designer despite not being able to stitch a button, meeting Taylor Hanson (yes, of MMMBop fame) and convincing him to fall in love with me, and owning a pet tiger. Realistic, I know.

But as I sat there in my yoga pants (a far cry from the tailored Chanel suit my 16-year-old self swore I’d wear every day), I realized something: we are always changing. Not just little tweaks here and there—complete rewrites of who we are, what we want, and how we see the world. And you know what? That’s okay.

The Wishlist of a Decade Ago vs. Now

When I was 10, I dreamed of being a pop star. Not because I could sing (I couldn’t and still can’t), but because I thought “microphones looked cool.” Fast forward to my 20s, and I was neck-deep in the “find your passion and hustle hard” phase, where dreams included corner offices and perfectly organized planners. Now, in my 30s, I dream of early bedtimes, inner peace, and a solid skincare routine that will keep me looking 25 for the next 30 years.

The goals shifted. They had to. Because life happened. Somewhere between heartbreaks, victories, small wins, and that time I ate an entire pizza alone in my car (don’t judge me; it was therapeutic), I grew up. I changed.

Why Do We Change? And How Do We Keep Up?

Change, my friends, is not just inevitable—it’s a full-time job. Here’s the truth:

1. Life Throws Plot Twists.
   Picture this: 18-year-old Butter, dreaming of traveling the world, wearing boho skirts, and “finding herself.” Plot twist? I realized I get hangry after two hours of sightseeing, and I can’t survive without decent coffee. Suddenly, “finding myself” sounded less appealing than “finding a clean hotel room.”Life surprises you, and as you collect more experiences, you change—whether you like it or not. You discover that maybe you don’t want to climb Mount Everest. Maybe you just want to climb out of bed on time. And that’s growth, too.
2. We’re Not Who We Thought We Were.
   When I was 14, I wrote a letter to my future self: “Dear Butter, I hope you have a red convertible by now and live in New York City with your perfect husband and three cats.”Let me tell you what’s actually true today: I have an aging Honda, I live in the suburbs, and I’m allergic to cats.We change because we learn who we are, layer by layer. Some dreams were never really ours to begin with; they were just things we thought we should want. And as we grow, we realize that life feels better when we stop chasing someone else’s dream and start chasing our own peace.
3. The People Around Us Change Us.
   You can’t grow in isolation. Your friends, family, colleagues, and random strangers you met at weddings shape you, whether they mean to or not. Your best friend might inspire you to pick up painting, while a terrible boss might teach you the importance of boundaries.I once had a roommate who convinced me to try running. I hated it—absolutely despised it—but I also realized that, hey, I’m someone who gives things a shot. That discovery alone made the blisters worth it.
4. Priorities Shift as We Grow.
   Remember when your biggest worry was whether your crush saw you in gym class? Ah, simpler times. Today, you’re juggling jobs, bills, relationships, and the nagging feeling that you should probably floss more often.Your dreams evolve because your priorities evolve. What you wanted at 15 might feel irrelevant at 30, and that doesn’t mean you “failed”—it means you adapted. You grew.

How to Manage Change (Without Losing Your Sanity)

1. Be Gentle With Your Past Self.
   If teenage you thought getting hair bangs would solve all your problems, forgive them. They were doing their best with what they knew. (And hey, maybe the bangs did look cute for a week.)
2. Regularly Check In With Yourself.
   Think of it like updating your phone’s software—except you’re updating you. Ask yourself every now and then:
   • “What do I actually want right now?”
   • “Is this goal still mine, or am I just chasing it out of habit?”
   The answers might surprise you.
3. Celebrate Who You Are Today.
   Don’t get so caught up in chasing future you that you forget to appreciate current you. Current you deserves a high five. You’re here, you’re trying, and you’re still growing. That’s more than enough.
4. Embrace the Unknown.
   Look, I never thought I’d be sitting on my bedroom floor at 10 p.m., eating stale cookies while reading about my teenage obsession with boy bands. But here I am, thriving. Life is unpredictable, and that’s the fun part.

Change Is Not a Crisis; It’s a Process

Here’s what I want you to know: Changing doesn’t mean you’re flaky. It doesn’t mean you’re lost or indecisive. It means you’re growing into who you’re supposed to be—one plot twist, one dream, and one dusty journal at a time.

So, if you find yourself with goals that no longer fit, dreams that feel outdated, or hobbies you’re suddenly tired of, let them go. Thank them for getting you this far, and make space for new ones.

After all, teenage me would be horrified that I never married a rock star, but you know what? Adult me is happier binge-watching Netflix in my sweatpants. And I think that’s a win.

Here’s to changing, growing, and maybe even eating an entire pizza in your car every now and then. No judgment here.